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Niall/Amery

fushicho_eien in thremedon

And ANOTHER Fanfic.. with Rook this time :D

Title: The Note
Summary: Thom's revelation makes Rook ask a question he never asks

Spoilers for Havemercy, if you havent read it :D I am assuming you guys have.

Okay, so Rook took over my head yesterday. This weird fic came from it. Not like my usual ones where it's first person. This one had to be third person. Dont know why. The cut quote is my favorite quote from the whole fic. Just so you know :D

“You don’t talk to me” For one crazy moment, Thom thought Rook was complaining. For one crazy moment, Rook was. Then he reminded himself that he didn’t want the stupid professor talking to him with all his Cindy shit about “working together” and “compassion” and “being nice” He didn’t want that.
Stupid Cindy trying to trip him up telling him he’s his brother. Brother, right.
He wasn’t Hilary. He couldn’t be.
That was a nasty trick, Rook was thinking. For all his lectures on morality, the stupid professor was no better than the rest of them, Rook included, but not counting Balfour, who, as far as Rook was concerned, wasn’t a real airman, anyway.
“I’m Hilary”
Those words tore through him stronger than Havemercy’s wings, sharper than a thousand knives. He was lying, Rook though. But he wasn’t. Scared, desperate, needy; yes. Lying, no. But he couldn’t not be lying.
Hilary was clumsy, carefree, sweet. This other man was not. He was hard. He would do what it took to survive.
He kept it a secret. Hilary never kept secrets. He kept his real name a secret. That was, by the Cindy’s standards, wrong, immoral. But why?
Rook sat on the steps outside the Airman, watching the stars. Why had Thom not told him right away? Not that he cared, but…why?
Why did he have to be his fucking brother? Why did it matter? He sighed. Why the hell did he have so many fucking questions that started with “why”? “Why” wasn’t his thing. “Why” got you killed. Rook never asked “why.”
The raid alarm began to blare, giving Rook no more time to think that night.
***
Rook laid in bed, staring at the ceiling, giving the other boys—and Thom, too, if he wanted, he had all day—a chance to shower. He wanted to figure something out before facing the professor, that something being the Thom-is-my-brother conundrum that had been bothering him for the past couple of weeks.
He had come to one conclusion, and one conclusion only: he didn’t want Thom to be his brother. He didn’t know why. Possibly because he was such a Cindy. More likely because of those intense eyes and his foolish stubbornness. Thom refused to back down, even when cornered. For some reason, Rook found this intriguing and found himself wanting to push him even more, wanting to know how far he could push, wanting to know when the professor would finally back down, or if he would break first.
Likely never. The stupid professor was stubborn like that.
Rook could feel a heavy weight settling somewhere it shouldn’t have been, and wondered—for the millionth time—why. Experimentally, he thought of the look on Thom’s face when he had him cornered, that stubborn look. The weight got heavier.
Holy shit, Rook thought, suddenly understanding the single conclusion he had come to.
Balfour banged on his door and yelled something about how th’Esar wanted them in the air and invading Ke-Han now
Rook jumped out of bed, about to go down the pole when suddenly, he thought of something. Running the risk of Adamo chewing his ass over wasting time, he ran out of the room to the common room. Thom was sleeping, so he wrote a quick note, placing it on the couch, then thinking better of that and stuffing it in a pair of his socks and putting in on the top of the couch. He hurried back to his room, scrambled down the pole, and mounted Have.
Then the world went to hell in the blink of an eye.
***
Thom needed socks. That’s all he would allow himself to think of at the moment, was socks, and possibly cleaning up his mess. He was just doing anything to keep from seeing the Airman’s half-empty—half-empty because people were here, they just didn’t show up—halls, anything to avoid Balfour’s sad eyes, anything to keep his mind off of him.
Why should he care? Thom wondered. Rook was horrible to him, he should be happy that he’s not here. But he wasn’t. Because Rook was John, and even if he had given up his right to call him brother when he did not immediately say so, he still cared and he still worried.
Ah! Socks! he thought , pulling his mind to the blue socks at the head of the couch and away from him. Ashe unfolded the socks, a piece of paper fluttered out. Curious as to why there was paper in his socks, he picked it up and read it.
He finally broke. Such a cruel trick to play, he thought as tears started to fill his eyes.
The note, which Thom had balled in his fist as he cried for the brother he would likely never see again, read: Love you Thom. Be back soon. Promise. R But he hadn’t come back. He had lied.
A gentle hand touched Thom’s shoulder, and he buried his head in the other man’s chest, assuming Balfour had heard him crying.
“Adamo almost killed me himself for stopping to write that” the man said after a while, once Thom’s sobs had almost stopped.
Thom jumped back, surprised, then recovered quickly.
“Didn’t hear you come in” he said
“You were crying too hard” Rook retorted, but with no real malice. He raised a hand to wipe away Thom’s tears, and Thom shied away. “Not gonna hurt you. Promise.” Thom stayed still and allowed him to do what he wished. “Why? Were you crying, I mean”
Thom held up the note, smiling a bit sadly. “Your fault”
“Sorry” Rook said as he pulled his little brother into a hug. “Sorry for being so late. Sorry for making you cry. Meant it as an apology”
“No. No apologies. Not needed. You came back”
“I fucking promised, didn’t I?” His voice broke, causing Thom to start crying even harder, clinging to the one he thought he’d lost. Rook just held him tighter.
They stayed like that for a while before swearing each other to secrecy and going on with their lives. It never happened as far as they were concerned, just like the conversation about being brothers. Never happened.
But Rook let Thom keep the note, and neither wondered why.

Comments

Sometimes OOCness just makes me so damn happy <3333

Good work, I love it! I feel so inspired~
I know I know.. but it was in my own fantasy world that Rook actually got some sense BEFORE he left, as opposed to after..

Glad you liked it, though..
lol I know, and I love it <3
You amaze me. So much. Gosh it was so sweet and Rook was Rook... but then he was the I'm-actually-being-sweet Rook and I just loved him for it. Great, great stuff.
:D glad you liked it.. I kind of remembered the bit where he said something about he was "fighting for his brother" who he loved or something to that effect (too lazy to go grab HM right now..) and realized that maybe MAYBE he could have come to his senses BEFORE he left.. just didnt tell anyone :D oh well.. in my dreams maybe :D
Aww, that was just sweet. :3 I love Rook/Thom moments, especially with allusions to the past, haha. <3